Issue #43 - This made me cry + my past

Psychology, spirituality, health and fitness trends, and productivity studies, as well as, my own life experiences inspire this newsletter.  Every week I discuss self-care, personal productivity, business, mindset, relationships, creativity, and how to balance busy home life.  


Welcome to issue #43 of {Upgrade with Nelly}

1. Inspiration 


Some people actively search for inspiration by looking to the gurus, the experts, the masters, and the influencers.  They watch YouTube videos and TedTalks, read blog articles (like this one), and buy many many books.  Will these inspire you?  Yes!  If you are open.  Do you know what else works? Simply being present with people, observing your environment, and noticing your feelings.


Here is how I have been allowing inspiration into my life this month:


- A friend called to say hi while she was taking a speed walk around the park.  I had not yet taken my afternoon walk that day and had an infinite list of things to do (as usual) before the kids would get home from school.  Yet, my priority is well-being and self-care.  I quickly completed two of the time-sensitive tasks and took my walk (I was inspired).  Funny enough, I felt so energized and refreshed after my walk that I was able to quickly complete many of the remaining tasks. 

- Visits to my mother-in-law's house always inspire me to clear out my kitchen counters, bake homemade goodies, and get more creative with my kids.  I feel no pressure to do any of this, but the inspiration leads me to.

- For over a year now I have been thinking about getting Invisiline (to make my teeth straighter).  Thinking = not doing. I was chatting with a friend and she mentioned that her kids were getting braces and that she had gotten Invisiline herself.  This quick convo (5 minutes total) totally inspired me to take action. On Thursday I have an appointment with an orthodontist for the initial consultation.  

- Being around people who are patient with their kids, inspires me to be more patient with my kids.  

- Being in beautiful orderly homes, inspires me to declutter and beautify.  



- Noticing the cashier act extra kind and friendly inspires me to pay it forward in my interactions with others after I leave the store.


The formula for allowing your everyday life to inspire you to greater heights.


Step 1: Inspiration (allow yourself to get inspired.  Inspiration is simply remembering or realizing what you want to do, to have, or to be.)


Step 2: Follow-through on the inspiration. 
AKA take action. (Do something. Anything.  Now.)


Inspiration can come from anywhere if you welcome it. 


And you know what else is cool?  When you allow yourself to take inspired action, you will pay it forward and inspire those around you.  


2. This made me cry

I dropped off my younger kids by their daycare today and then turned on the radio in my car.  94.7FM in NY.  Country radio (yes, I love country music.)


A song came on.


It made me cry.
A full meaningful crying session.


Was it tears of joy?
Was it tears of sadness?
Was I just tired and need a good cry?


It was something better.
It was tears of light, tears of truth, tears of being connected to my feelings.


So I won't share more of what or why this specific song resonated with me in this very moment.  That doesn't actually matter. You can listen to this song (Runaway June - we were rich) and have your own experiences with it.  Or you may have no experience with it at all!  This may not be the song to resonate with you.  The question to consider is: what will?



It is important that we feel our feelings. 
That we listen to music, watch movies, see art, hear stories, read books, read poetry, and do other such things that move us!  



Allow yourself to be moved.
Allow yourself to feel your feelings.



I used to say to my acting students* (what? more below): "All feelings are good.  Don't judge them, just feel them.  Let them pass through you and then you move on." 



Our wide gamut of emotions makes us who we are as humans and as individuals.  
Our feelings guide us.
They show us where our passion is.
They show us what we care most about.
They draw us to what we love (and what we love is a sign of our purpose).


3. Fun Fact

*Acting students what?  (as I mentioned above)

From 2007-2012 I owned and was the master teacher at the most popular "acting for non-actors" and creative studio for adults in the tri-state area!  It was called Lessons for Fun Studio and was located in Midtown Manhattan. What happened in 2012?  My second daughter was born and I got into full-time mommy mode.  But that time was full of incredible memories and we all had the best time at The Studio.  If anyone reading this, is one of our old students from back in the day, please say hi!)

4. Weekly Check-Ins


Here is my progress report on the November goals which are: daily exercise, choosing words wisely, creating and sharing content, and playing games.


How are you doing with your November goals?


1. Daily Exercise


I'm doing it and I'm loving it.  It took me a few weeks to get into the flow of things but I finally have exercise down as my daily ritual.  I don't do it for long - and the length of my workouts definitely needs to be upgraded - but I do it, and I love it.


I have been doing the 30-day squat challenge (link in the resources section below).  Today is day 18.


Plus, today I'm adding on a new arm sculpting challenge.  I'm so excited!!!


*If you just discovered the newsletter and thinking "that's very nice for you, Nelly.  But I can barely get myself off the couch, what are you telling me about multiple challenges for?  Please, read the last two issues.  I was just there!  I share the exact method I used to get myself out of the rut.  Steal my method!



2.  Choosing words wisely

I am working on a new self-improvement habit of choosing words that are kind, empowering, and positive.


Last week I have been focusing on the tone of voice, not only on the words.  


I tried speaking in what feels like a whisper and this has been working really well with my kids and my husband.  (I naturally have a very loud voice, so what felt like a whisper was most likely just a normal calm tone.)



I also have been doing some deeper inner work using Louis Hay's book (link in resources below) and recalling stories and "mantras" that I heard in my family as a child.  There is one specific thing my parents always said to me when I shared my big ideas, huge dreams, and enormous visions with them.  It's a discouraging line. Roughly translated from my native Russian language it means "what else did you make up?" I always saw it as such a negative and discouraging phrase...but I have realized that there are several interpretations of what it could actually mean.  Why did I interpret it in this limiting way? (we all did this as kids!). And so I have chosen to understand this expression from a different angle.  From one that actually feels truthful, and more positive.

3.  Creating and sharing content

I have been sharing a bit more content on social media than usual.  My initial goal was to do much better than this so I'm not there yet.

I had been brainstorming a lot and came up with a new idea for a series titled "Celebrating Women".  I will experiment with this concept next week on Facebook.



4. Play games

The goal for the month is to play more (check back to Issue #41 of why play is so important).


Favorite new game: talking with a really bad British accent for a prolonged period of time.  Very dramatic, Shakespearian talk is my inspiration.  Totally drives my kids and husband crazy which makes it even more fun for me!

Also, Sudoku.  I've been playing Sudoku.
My daughter Hannah took a liking to it too!  Who knew.



I was planning to play battleship with Lev this week (my favorite game) but didn't get around to it yet.  Adding it to my plan for next week.  Do you know what else would be fun to play?  Does anyone remember Super Nintendo?  The ol' school one...with the grey remote control.  Am I aging myself here?  



5. Resources mentioned in today's newsletter

These are the products and resources I have mentioned in today's issue.

 30-Day Squat Challenge

21-Day Arm Sculpting Challenge

You Can Heal Your Life (book) by Louis Hay (BOOK)

Runaway June - we were rich (SONG)

Super Nintendo (this is the new version)

Thanks for reading.

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Wishing you health, happiness, and success in all of your endeavors.